I’ll Fiiiiiiiiiind You

Well, I survived my first outing sober as a judge. Actually, that would have been a good Halloween costume, but I went as sushi, which was a blast. I was a little on the fence about going out, especially considering that it was Halloween, but seeing as I suffer from serious FOMO (Fear of missing out), I met up with a girlfriend from work and went to a party with her crew.

So the thing about being sober at a party is that you notice everything. I also suffer from a bad case of people watching, so this was like a gold mine. Not only were people drinking like Civil War soldiers preparing to get their limbs sawed off, but Holy Moses, they were loud. The music was played at an appropriate level, but everyone was just shouting their thoughts. Like not even good thoughts, just thoughts. I’ll be the first one to admit that I’m guilty of this when I hit the sauce, because I have seen snapchats, read texts and have just said my thoughts aloud to myself when no one was listening, ya know, like a normal drunk. I also noticed the dancing. Everyone has the confidence of Beyoncé and it is actually pretty cool to see everyone cut a rug with such chutzpah because there’s no way I look that awesome sober dancing.

We hit the bars and went downtown. It was a blast seeing all of the costumes and seeing how creative everyone could get. I feel like people are trying to be funnier instead of out hotting each other, which is awesome. I didn’t partake in any of the shots that were offered to me, and no one batted an eye, so that was cool. I don’t think it’ll be that hard to not drink and go out and about. Now, will I be a Sober Sally and hit the town every weekend? Absolutely not. But I’ll totally dabble every once in a while.

I will add this, though. My apartment building just added a 20% discount to my nacho run place and it took every fiber of my sober being to say no to the glorious delicacy that is 2 am nachos. Dats some self control.

Moving on.

Now, I’m not sure if it’s because I bought the new TSwift CD (don’t even knock it. It’s amazing and my only regret is I didn’t buy the deluxe addition), but I have seriously just been bummed and in a weird place with the dating deal.

And when I say dating deal, I mean it in the loosest way possible, because I’m not dating anyone. At all. I’m just out here being me on my own and for some reason, I’ve developed an issue with it. Like what happened to my I’m Independent, I Don’t Need No Man Hannah? A couple of weeks ago, I was totally cool and embracing being single but now all I want to do is listen to Dashboard and wonder what’s wrong with me, or at least have a dude to tell me nothing is wrong with me and eat pizza and watch Tommy Boy with me. I think fall is definitely the season of love because everyone seems to start dating in fall and then cozy up for winter together.

The thing is, I’m not bitter at all towards people who have someone, I’m happy for them! I want them to feel the fuzzies but at the same time, I want fuzzies and the make-ya-feel-dumb-when-I-talk-to-you feeling. I know I said last week I wasn’t ready to date, but maybe I am. I ran into a friend from high school on Halloween and she was with her boyfriend who she started dating this summer. They have known each other forever and just now started dating! They were absolutely adorable together and just having a blast and completely glowing. So now I’m wondering if I have had a dude in front of my nose and haven’t noticed and now we are going to fall in love. If you’re out there, guy I’ve known forever, I’ll find you. (Read that in the girl from Wedding Crashers’ voice and then forget I said it because I don’t want you to think I’m a weirdo).

I’m in one of my best friend’s weddings this weekend and I am over the moon excited! I can’t wait to see her marry her best friend! I’ve been tanning for it because I thought I had the dark hair, pale skin like Nancy Botwin from Weeds look, but it was mostly just dark hair with skin so white, I’d be one of those dots on those ghost shows and wouldn’t actually look like a person in the pictures. I gotta say, I’m actually kind of privy to the latter because my cheeks are just fried and I feel out of place. Anyway, that was completely unnecessary but whatever.

This weekend will be a blast! Can’t wait to see everyone and my friend become a Mrs!! ☺️☺️

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